I’m a guy, and I need feminism. Not “men’s rights.” Feminism. Here is why.
Everything that MRAs talk about that men can’t do or are socially punished for arise directly and immediately from misogyny. Not “misandry.” Misogyny.
Whether I am expressing my emotions, playing with children, baking, having sex wherein I am penetrated in any way, wearing the wrong color, talking the wrong way, moving the wrong way, being sexually harassed/assaulted, or paying too little attention to looking like I’m not paying attention to how I look, when society punishes me or derides me or marginalizes me for these things, it is happening because they are things women, not men, are expected to do, and our society at large fucking hates women.
Has that sunk in yet?
Men, can you even think of a single goddamn way you have ever been mocked that wasn’t related to something that a misogynist society sees as feminizing? Even when large men are mocked for their bodies, they are referred to as having “man-boobs,” for fucks sake.
How do you expect to improve those things with “men’s rights?” What right are you fighting for? I can tell you what I think you’re fighting for. I think you’re fighting for the right to contain and control misogyny, and direct it back at women, where you think it belongs. You want to maintain your privilege but erase its consequences, and that’s why your movement is farcical; it’s a big fucking feedback loop. How do you expect men to be free from the peripheral effects of misogyny when you refuse to even fucking believe it’s real?
(Heterosexual) male privilege is talking about how bad it is to have a gay man incessantly hit on you when you aren’t interested, having it accepted as a common opinion, and still not understand how a woman can feel the same way when you do the same thing.
Male privilege is telling women on the street - who you’ve never met before - to smile, and then acting offended when they don’t.
Male privilege is describing women being cautious about sexual assault as “misandry”, then, in another situation, blaming a victim for (apparently) not being cautious enough.
Male privilege is making jokes about women and using women’s offended responses as proof that they’re “overly sensitive” or “melodramatic”, then using women making jokes about men as proof that women are “callous” and “bitchy”.
Male privilege is being offended at being called sexist, but making fun of women who are offended at actual sexism.
Male privilege is complaining when women don’t reward treating them with basic dignity with sex. Male privilege is thinking you “deserve” or are “owed” a woman. Male privilege is treating friendships with women as failed conquests. Male privilege is putting the blame on women for not wanting to date you, instead of accepting that dating is not a one-sided thing. (In regards to “the friend zone”).
Male privilege is thinking that when you’re hired instead of a woman, it’s because you’re more qualified, but when a woman is hired instead of you, it’s affirmative action or she slept with them.
Male privilege is thinking you’re entitled to make comments about women’s bodies and clothes whenever you please, and then telling women they should feel flattered by this.
Male privilege is thinking consciption is a valid proof of “misandry” when the last conscripted soldier left the US army in 1973 and the UK army in 1963, and when more women are killed in their homes by their male partnersevery year than male soldiers killed in Afghanistan and Iraq put together.
Male privilege is calling all nerdy women “fakers” and making them “prove” they’re nerds with questions, while doing no such thing for male nerds.
Male privilege is assuming everyone is male until proven otherwise, and also recieving little to no criticism for doing so.
Male privilege is expecting the lead in any film or TV series to be the same gender as you, and being correct almost every single time. (Seriously - how many movies not SPECIFICALLY aimed at women have female leads? How many movies not SPECIFICALLY amed at men have male leads?)
Male privilege is having your country leader and the majority of the legislative body be the same gender as you, and have your gender’s interests in mind.
Male privilege is having bodily autonomy.
(Cis) male privilege is not having to worry about visiting foreign countries because you know how poorly they treat your gender there.
Male privilege is having no risk presented to your career if you choose to start a family.
Male privilege is acting like women having maternity leaves is biological fact without realising that (aside from the birth) men can stay home and look after the newborn baby just fine - you just assume that the woman has to do it.
Male privilege is walking around in summer with just shorts on, but criticising any woman who’d do the same (… even if she’s still wearing more than you!).
Male privilege is sleeping with whomever you like, but calling any woman who does the same (even if she does so less than you) a “whore” who “has no self-respect”.
Male privilege is expecting to be just as, or even more, desirable because you’re sexually active/experienced, yet considering any woman who’s done the same “worthless”, “disgusting” or “cheap”.
Male privilege is ogling, touching or making unsolicited sexual advances at women and saying you “can’t help it” and “men are naturally like that”, then saying that it’s misandry when women agree that all men just “can’t help themselves” and “are naturally like that”.
Male privilege is thinking “being respectful and decent to a woman” is synonymous with “chivalry”… male privilege is not doing the former in order to “get back at feminists” who say the latter is misogynistic.
why is it that guys think they deserve a thank you for being descent people and not harassing or pushing me for something sexual?
like, hi i’m at a bar and you’re cute and flattering and all, but i’m not interested. that being said, ahem — I’M NOT GOING TO THANK YOU BECAUSE YOU KEPT YOUR HANDS OFF OF ME. I’M NOT GOING TO THANK YOU BECAUSE YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH AFTER I TOLD YOU TO BACK OFF. I’M NOT GOING TO THANK YOU BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T DO JACK SHIT TO DESERVE MY THANKS. oh i’m sorry, am i supposed to be glad that you were being a descent human being and respected the rules i gave you over my body?
CONGRATULATIONS, YOU’RE A DOUCHEBAG.
in conclusion, no, i’m not on birth control but that doesn’t discredit my involvement and investment in this issue. fuck yes i’m upset about this and i have every reason to be. you should be pretty fucking upset about it too. especially if you call yourself a feminist.